just threw up while drinking by myself. This is all your fault. You here = a good night, You not here = alcoholism
around noonish you got carried out for spitting water and throwing cups at old people...
i just heard one Asian kid say to another, "i bet if i could get into Harvard i could get laid all the time, my brother lost his virginity the first night there."
its was like we drinking an entire bottle of mystery
pretty sure I offered to blow her dad. she's not speaking to me & he won't stop winking at me.
He refused my I'm sry gift of ANAL. That's how angry he was.
I rode on his Vespa around Florence and fucked him in an empty train. It was like a way sluttier version of Lizzy McGuire
I'm gonna be a few minutes late, some asshole just fell off the ferry so we had to stop.
If magic marker is safe for kids, it should be safe for cats...right?
You are under a naked attack watch for the whole weekend. Shelter in place.
I wish university was like frosh week all the time and then they just give you a degree for surviving
I understand, but unless there is an intervention for me being planned, i DON NOT want to talk about my life choices
We put a ban on pants at an unusually early point in the night.
I just remember yelling "BODY SHOTS BODY SHOTS BODY SHOTS" while I was streaking
I'm setting goals and achieving them. I'd say I'm quite mature for my age.
You're goal was to fuck him and you don't even remember it.
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