That was rough. We had a 50% puke rate and 100% still drunk rate at lunch
some gay kid said he wanted to blow him because "his eyebrows told a story"
Just caused a nice traffic jam while trying to park at Costco. Too high to drive.
My picture of a beer can in a McDonalds cup full of ice got more likes than my relationship with her. Is beer THAT much better than monogamy?
Had sex with one of the guys from Ireland. Celebrating st pattys early.
Waking up at a teachers house is a very confusing thing
Just assume that every drink in that house has alcohol in it.
the good news is that even if it's Alex's, I can still say it's Colin's, because the kid will come out ginger anyway!
who knew there'd be a plus side to your ginger fetish one day?
There is a high pitched squealing noise coming from somewhere in my house. I hope it's a gas leak cause I'm over this week man.
Sooooooo, maybe just fucked on a motorcycle.
I'm pretty sure the rest of my evening will consist of masturbating, drinking tequila and watching children's movies.
all i want is a guy to go down on me while i eat peanutbutter from a jar
whatever. i just wanna get "forget my own name" wasted
no. you need to know your name so people know where to return you when you get lost.
I just gave a fucking twenty minute blowiob.. I'm a GOOD girlfriend.
I thought I was drunk because I kept grabbing his arm instead of his dick
But then I realized it wasn’t his arm and that I was very lucky
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