Tell LD happy birthday and party like it's $19.99
Recession joke.
and the mascot is a pinecone. its really no surprise that people here dont get laid
is 1am too late, or too early to make bacon?
Its like im going on a blind date, but ive already had sex with her
Since my computer broke, i've been masterbating to girls gone wild. I feel like i'm in the 90's.
Yea, i was tied up and blindfolded. And someone was throwing chicken nuggets at my face.
All three women i have fucked in the past week are here in the same bar. Gameface, go.
Gonna go for any of them?
Thursday night girl, but friday is watching and tuesday is serving us.
I'm with Tony. He said he volunteers his ball sack for waxing but you will have to wait a few weeks. It is a freshly shaved sack. I guess he thought he was gonna get lucky. Wtf?
Smooth sack
The sun and I are not on speaking terms this morning
We started pregaming at 8. It's 11, and her only 11:11 wish is to be sober. It's hard to not love her.
You must be buzzed on Miller Lite.. Zen master advice is flowing
It was a great idea to buy that cocaine while dressed as an elf. It snowed all night for me.
You can't honestly expect me to maintain an erection when you have the Glen Beck show on
He doesn't wear a seatbelt. He votes Republican. He has a small dick. That house of cards just fell apart.
No, this year you're all getting coupons for things like "no yelling because you had sex in my apartment" or "the last beer."
Randomize
