I may or may not have screamed I'M ON A BOAT while having sex...on a boat. I think I was born to have sex with him.
we are driving next to a guy driving and masturbating while looking at a naked magazine. I love LA
thats the last time i clean cum out of my retainer.
id pay someone 5 dollars to tell me whos house im at right now. comfy couch though
Just drive me around campus, I will be able to smell their innocence.
i wanna meet her so much more now that I know she got toed in a hottub.
Just hooked up with the fireman who put out the quesadilla fiasco last tuesday.
She apparently grabbed another girl and pulled her into the shower fully clothed. When the girl was like "you need to stop" she curled up into a ball and refused to leave.
Whoa, you know how to pick em.
I have a gyno appt today. I hate it when the Army gets involved with my vagina.
Chicks before dicks must only mean American dicks
YOU IS KIND. YOU IS SMART. YOU IS IMPORTANT. YOU IS CLEANING YOUR OWN VOMIT.
I have no idea what happened last night, but my pee is neon green.
So that guy from plenty of fish has a lightning bolt tattooed on his face. I kinda feel like I HAVE to sleep with him now.
Why in the hell is there a guy dressed up as a horse passed out in our kitchen.
happy birthday!
I woke up naked next to my hot manager. Left before she woke up, and worked an entire shift with her. She has no idea.
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