So tell me more about the cum that came out of your nose
This girls a $30 bar tab from being bi
this is ridiculous... i look like a white version of MC Hammer...
Is it wrong that im more embaressed about the karoke than the toplessness?
One of my students just said I have "big mommy parts". Even third graders know that my tits are too big. God I love em.
so I'm in athletic shorts, a suit jacket and I'm still drunk at 6:30am at the last leg of relay for life
Kinda felt bad though cuz she whimpered and shuttered a lot, i felt like i was kicking a puppy, only the puppy liked it and came a bunch
can you put a coffee maker in the dish washer? yo know what, nvm i want to be surprised
Sorrye. The bathtuv says hi. But theresno water in it. I've wanted too tell you for the longest, but nevr could
After being his wingman last night, I've decided I will never talk about becoming a lesbian ever again. Picking up chicks is way too hard.
Is it acceptable to have my intern get me pedialite and plan b?
It's a learning experience. She can add to her resume that she cured her bosses hangover and poor decisions
Chilling on my porch debating between pre work drinking or video games and getting high.
Yeah. We're taking this fuck buddy relationship to the next level. Sober weekday sex.
What doesn't this kid understand that our relationship is not going past the blacked out blowjob I gave him on his birthday?
I am putting clothes on to go find a brownie
In my experiences, brownies are better naked.
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