i think my tv is drunk
Just watched a guy pause a bluetooth convo to puke outside of esso. gotta love orangeville
just customized my debit card w a pic of me ralphing over the toilet. figure it'll give the bar keep a good cut off est and for shits n giggles when buying my handles at the liqour store
May or may not have found my way onto a stripper bus. To Chicago.
who do i root for if I want Christiano Ronaldo to win the world cup on a team by himself and then bang chicks on the pitch?
Please tell me nicole sent the picture of the ejaculating penis to you too, otherwise I'll feel really awkward
We just made a drinking game out of our chemistry review. This might explain my chemistry grade.
just let her blow you already, it's practically animal cruelty at this point.
I actively tried geting in the guy's pants and ended up in the girl's. I'm bad at this whole straight while drunk thing.
I am never going on a blind date ever again. He drank way too much and kept telling me I had a nice boob. Like.. Singular. What's the other one? The ugly twin?
I can't even express how horny I am. The English language isn't equipped for what I'm plotting.
Just FYI, by the transitive property my breasts have now touched the Stanley Cup.
Someone explain why I'm twerking in my bathroom right now before a charity run
how is it I left wearing underwear then ended up with none? and why is it they are on you?
Look, I am sorry I shaved your cat...but get over it.
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