Good luck man
I dont need it. Shes easy.
I accidently shit my pants. So I tried to throw my underwear in their lake, but they floated. So in the middle of the night, I got into the paddle boat and had to throw a rock on top of them so they would sink. Next time, I just won't shit myself.
you went to subway and got pissed when they refused to deep fry your sub
I wish you got a notification every time someone masturbated to a Facebook picture of you...
Professor used "ROFL" while grading my paper... Do I even go to a real college?
we've progressed from teabagging to lighting eachothers asses on fire. this cannot be a good path.
i knew it was going to be a good night when i was bleeding, licked it and it tasted like miller light
was it me or did you scream 'champagne motherfucker' when you punched him in the face ??
I'm off the liquor
You're forefathers are ashamed of you. They didn't struggle to make it to America so that you could become a soft dick
HOW LONG TILL THESE DRUGS WEAR OFF. I WORK IN ONE HOUR, I REPEAT, I WORK IN ONE HOUR.
Her desktop wallpaper is a collage of penises she fucked.
dont iron anything. we fucked on the ironing board. details to follow.
Do u feel more socially accepted since someone else made up their girlfriend too?
It's 1:26 and I have already found 5 fruit flies between 3 separate glasses of wine. This is supposed to be a summer problem. Fucking global warming.
i just realized I haven't been laid all summer. So sad. What a waste of a perfectly good vagina.
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