So I just had this crazy idea, and no it has nothing to do with the fact that they made me take shots at work.
Reach down the front of your pants and feel around for a while. When you find your balls, leave the library and meet me at the bar.
I wish you could order shots online.
You made a list of reasons why you should be on fear factor. You came up with 2 reasons: "I like fear" and "I am fear"
my co-worker, his best friend who also works with us, an my baby daddy, ive turned love triangle into a retarded shape with to many sides to pronounce
If I remember who won the superbowl tomorrow morning.. I think I'm just going to quit drinking. There really won't be a point anymore
I'm at a bar. It's body paint Wednesday. All of the waitresses are topless. Help me
LOVE ME MORE THAN PIZZA CAN
Had a dream that you were held at gun point. But I killed the guy. Then we embraced in the biggest hug while everyone around us clapped... Kinda how I imagine our wedding...
So his roommate walked in on us, went upstairs to tell her bf she has found a new use for the rafters & they must try it.
Meh, all I have to do tomorrow is proctor an AP test. No loud noises and no physical activity allowed for almost 4 hours. Sounds like the perfect recovery period for a hangover.
She is 6 months pregnant and gets more action at bars than I do.
She was crying and pulled the collar of her shirt up to blot the tears. And then she just kept her head there. And stopped crying. "My boobs are just too amazing for me to cry." her words not mine please help she's still in that position
Just seriously saw this chick say, watch this motherfuckers then did a 42 sec keg stand.
You at least asked for her number right?
well we started off by chasing vodka with chocolate milk and ended up trying to befriend a crippled raccoon so that should tell you how our night went
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