You drink too much
No, I drink just the right amount - too often.
He jizzed my face. I had to ask for a washcloth. He ran his underwear under the water and handed them to me. Not so romantic.
I love college. Only here at ten in the morning can you hear "Man, hot sauce on my pussy was my worst idea in a long time." while walking down the hall.
Are you pissed because you didn't get action, or the fact i got boned twice in public places tonight?
that was probably me. ive bitten a lot of people.
I woke up spooning my guard tube. Tell me I'm not the most dedicated lifeguard ever
Admit it. It's a brilliant plan with hundreds of possible repercutions.
Understatement of the year.
You drink it until you puke in a vent one time and it's ruined forever.
Seeing your one night stand on campus never gets less awkward. Why is Subway the only good place to eat?
We'll just play it by vagina and see where it leads us
I woke up naked under desk at her apt once during my freshman year. I should have known that friendship was of a different breed...
This guy has a theme song for the joints he rolls
I had a flashback of using my sock as a napkin after we got taco bell
How are you feeling this morning?
Well, I just found day old puke in my bra, so I've been better.
Questions: How did Rachel get home? Why did I find both her ID's in my shoes? And does anyone know if she's alive?
Randomize
