I took off my clothes and she wanted to have sex. But then she changed her mind. So we ended up fucking through her panties or something. I don't know it was weird.
at first I thought it was funny, but looking at it now, it screams "dramatic" and "medicated wipes."
I have a ginormous moral hangover. Strip club blues.
I just had a formal request to dress as a boyscout for my meeting with Legal on Friday. From Legal. Time to go home.
Was just explained ingredients in a four loko. Puzzles of the universe starting to piece together.
I didn't know what to do with her so I just tied her to a bench.
i'm pregaming while finishing a paper on cardio myocyte contractility in mice. i'm kicking finals week's ass right now
you pushed her into a kiddie pool and knocked out her front teeth... and you still managed to get laid. what. the. fuck.
Yeah I said my new jacket was waterproof, not puke through your nose proof.
I threw up off of your balcony and it must have been loud because the dog downstairs went insane.
I spent all the money my grandpa gave me for Christmas last night….solid start to 2015
I will 100% jerk off using my own tears as lube before I'd ever bang a 4.
well you're talking to a woman who had glorious sex less than 24 hrs ago so my opinion is biased.
all I remember is them saying he had a big dick and the next thing I know I’m leaving with him
My law teacher drew an elephant on the board in class. I was so high that I laughed for 5 minutes straight. Nobody else laughed and everyone stared. 130 people knew I was high.
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