Best walk of shame ever - Brown Hennesy shirt, bright blue overly large basketball shorts, stilettos from night before - ended up buying a ton of 40's and a 30 pack of coors.
Where are you?
A place I should not be.
Princeton has an emergency contraception worldwide website. It is in moments like these that I love my university
I think that i just found proof that harry and ginny had sex
around noonish you got carried out for spitting water and throwing cups at old people...
you just used a box of cheese-its to get into the bar
I don't know. I guess at the end of the day I wanted taco bell more than a boyfriend.
Totally get that.
The bouncers kicked us out around 3 so we went to the grocery store flasks in hand and asked them to turn up their music...
i was enjoying my post acid trip trance a little too much. i found $50 on the sidewalk but didnt pick it up. just stared at the bill cuz it looked cool.
someone picked it up and i stared at the ground where it was for probably another minute or 2
Because I'm a hot mess throwing up in the litter box
So I've been in more fights on one leg than I've had on two.
I went by my nickname in rehab. It made it feel more like summer camp.
I don't get it. Why have babies when you can have vodka?
The only time we had a decent conversation was when he was on acid, and, like, that's not a great start to a relationship.
There are footprints all over my windshield
You said you were making waffles...
Just come here quick. I'm home in 3min. It will take you literally less than 5 to walk. Then 2 to undress, 16 to fuck, 2 to dress again and 5 to walk back..!!
exactly 16 eh??
Randomize
