Kroger has a sale on economy packs of some ridic brand of condom with a smiley devil heart on it $4.99 for 24
Sounds like a baby waitign to happen
i feel like pocahontas...the disney character not from real chance of love
I know its been a few months but you must know you hve the 2nd biggest dick I've ever seen. 1st place went to a rapper so don't feel bad.
A very small part of me wants you to appreciate me for more than just my breasts. But the rest of me is breasts.
I think it's a friendship ring and the other part is on his cats collar
I didn't plan on sleeping with him until he told me his mom is deaf.. Then I felt bad.
I am self-sufficient. I puked in a wine glass and emptied it in the trash. Points for style and neatness
Please take a moment of silence for the fact that I still have all 10 fingers
You were force feeding yourself jello and you kept repeating, "I will not surrender"
Mom looked at me, frowned, and said "it makes me sad to see you drink before noon.." So i told her if she doesn't like it she needs to stop waking me up before noon.
I just got St Patricks day and the day after St Patricks day off, wich I'm pretty sure is as close to a raise as I'll ever get.
Just brought out that old CCM hockey helmet. The one covered in sharpie penises with "DRUNK BUCKET" written across the front. The number of tally marks / initials from tonight's drunk stunts alone is equal parts inspiring and alarming.
I'm bathroom at buffalo wild wings
I think incapable of making pants work send help
Blacked out and Irish exited last night. At dinner. On a Sunday.
He's going to be in the air guitar championships in june. Need I say more.
Randomize
