your butthole totally puckers for the ginge
Pick my eyebrow is burning. I'm sitting in the back of dolows vat and listening to jolly music and wilfgang is signing and looking food. Cute kid. Home is where I go now.
what. the. fuck.
im so hungover...we just watched The Perfect Storm and i got seasick
We're playing Edward Bottle-of-eight-dollar-sale-wine-hands now
he got a charlie horse midthrust which triggered my orgasm we're still sorting this out.
Just grabbing my bra from a history teacher's desk in the Humanities building. Maybe I should stop drinking on weeknights
So who won the naked front yard Olympics last night?
Well my tits are spray painted gold & i have what i think r the Olympic rings shaved in my vag !!!!!!!SO its safe to say i won something ....
You came home with a traffic cone and said, "this is my birthday condom."
It's always a good night until the penis tattoo makes an appearance
Ummm so I'm at the hospital and just heard some guy get tazed......twice.
Wearing the same clothes for three days in a row and eating an entire two pound bag of jelly beans really has a way of making a person rethink their life...
dont ever go to laser tag drunk. you will be judged.
Ohhhhhh, that night......I need to stop drinking, almost all of my conversations that take place Wed thru Sun after 8:30 are one blurry haze.
It's a classy one I promise! Their toilets are cushioned an tier wifi is named hummingbird
No one can touch me, I'm made of fruit.
Randomize
