"The real world" DC house is on the corner of 20th and S. Wanna come with to check it out? It's my goal to be a blurred out face in their hot tub.
I'm pretty sure "Like A Prayer" will forever remind me of drunk nights & pants down around the ankles
I woke up in what appears to be a taco bell graveyard in my bed.
I'll go out only because I know the starving children in third-world countries would frown upon us if we let an hour of free sangria go to waste...
that was you who tried to jump in front of my car in the monkey suit wasnt it
Just found a picture of a hobo making out with her tits...a HOBO
You can come over, sure. But I'll be watching college hockey during the blow job.
Nothing says "I forgive you for puking on me during sex" like a Facebook add the next morning...
She has a lazy eye!
My other option is a hardwood floor
Don't bother coming over to clean the mess. I already paid two kids 5 bucks for it, just didn't tell them you peed all over the place. You do owe me 5 bucks though
You tried to initiate "Occupy McDonald's" when the cashier didn't give you enough ketchup.
Traded my phone for pizza, then got it back this morning....successful night
Trying to roll joints on a seadoo in the middle of a lake on a windy night. -Juststonerthings
I've got a surprise in the fridge when you get back.
Is it a puppy?
is it bad that im laying on a beach towel in my room with my lights on high pretending to be tanning on the beach in the summer?
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