I think I just saw the silver monkey from legends of the hidden temple sitting out in someone's trash
GO. BACK. NOW.
Dude..TWLOHA day. gonna write LOVE on my arms before going to the bar tonight. its like a pussy guarantee.
woke up with ski boots on and a kayak in my room... birthday successful? i'd say so
im trying not to drink and cry in the same night anymore. i'll let you know how it goes
I guess at this point I should stop judging guys on their looks and more on their major and trust fund. Growing up sucks.
totally worth getting kicked out for trying to throw my drink on lindsay lohans ankle bracelet.
found a cell phone. in the freezer. wrapped in bologna. explain?
I feel like everytime I call him he's either fucking or getting into trouble. It's really disturbing that he presses the answer button and then proceeds to fuck her harder.
Do you remember lying across two tables saying 'go away I'm trying to pull' to me, Sollie and Sean?
I just got the two most enjoyable things in life in one... Weed delivered in bubble wrap.
Carver called his mom a milf again
Was it on purpose this time?
So my family just woke up on Easter morning and shared a bowl. That's bonding😊
Well I'm back. Could you fill me in on what I missed?
You don't want to know. Trust me.
A relationship is waiting for him to fall asleep so you can cum (finally!) while watching porn
So I guess I walked across campus with "pat my ass" in sharpie on my forehead.
You deserve it, you colossal cock block.
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