I've come to the conclusion that if I was an old man, I would perve around in short gym shorts for kicks.
thats it. im googling how to make you boobs smaller. this is getting out of control.
i've come to the conclusion that there is no classy way to apply chloroseptic spray to your butthole.
Learned a lot. Like boys with frosted tips still exist. And that they're sensitive to constructive criticism.
so my car got towed last night. I didnt know it cost 118 dollars to have a college experience
she told me she sucks everyone's dick but mine because mine is too big and "hard to suck" i need to reevaluate the girls i fall in love with.
I've never heard a "this is the reason why i dont suck your cock" explanation go in that direction
My family just legit passed around a fifth of Maker's Mark. Also, this is sort of a Thanksgiving tradition. Also, Maker's Mark is really good.
Dude, she's the greatest salesman alive. she convinced chelsea to buy a box of Cheerios for $20. She can find your dick some willing pussy.
sorry for laughing and taking pictures while you were having an asthma attack on st. patricks day
I got "plug" during family Catch Phrase and struggled to not make a reference to butt plug so I skipped it
I'm like 'WOMAN, YOU'RE 62, RESHEATH THOSE COUGAR CLAWS.'
I don't know if the fact that I carry lube in my purse means I'm living life right or I'm doing it wrong..
I think I'm actually too depressed to do drugs, wow.
Yeah, oh and the story gets better. His friend was dressed as a christmas tree wrapped in twinkle lights and had to plug himself in the wall all night.
When we were fucking he called me by his moms name then after we were done told me to call him. He's not receiving a call... What if his mom picks up?
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