Hi, this is ****, we hooked up a few weeks ago. I was wondering, do you have any STDs?
I'm either going to be a Playboy Playmate or take over the world. Either way the world wins.
Will you Wikipedia Vin Diesel? Is he gay? It's important...
We removed her tutu and her cape, so there's no risk of her strangling herself.
Your panties and toothbrush are in your mailbox. just not ready to be with anyone serious. take care.
Hes wearing a shirt that says warning shitshow and i cant help but think his attorney made him wear it so ppl know the dangers.
Whatever happend to that lawsuit where he got sued for shittig in that fish tank
Is the booze for tonight or the apocalypse?
Both. Pregaming the zombie party and hurricane sustenance.
By the way, anytime you want to go toe to toe on Doggystyle lyrics just let me know!
Who is this? Did we just become best friends?!
A guy just grabbed my balls before he shook my hand because he thought he knew me.
That Kevin guy is something else...His penis is fucking glorious. And he has a way with words. If he lived here I'd be the conductor of the fuck caboose. I mean literally I would never want to get off that thing.
You know it was one hell of a night when you need to use your own thong to wipe cum off your face.
I know you've been in hospital with meningitis, but last night I walked into a streetlight and bruised my penis so who's really suffering here
Oh my god if I have to go on fetlife to find a guy who will fuck me right around here, I'm going to scream.
You know it’s going to be a rough day when you scream “Get fucked” at your alarm clock
Well, I like big penises but it's not like he walks around with it out or anything so yes I think he has beautiful eyes
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