I have all these new brothers and sisters I'm just now finding out about
STOP acting like a freshman, you have a drivers liscence now AND a PERSCRIPTION for birth control. Dont give all sophmores a bad name. Woman Up
They were done having sex when I went to the room. They had that look on their faces.
Disappointment?
So getting a bj to I believe I can fly is one of the greatest things ever
Ice cream: Good. Fraternity: Good. Eating ice cream off a Skid Row bum's ass crack in order to get into a Fraternity: Homoerotic at best. I quit.
Why is everyone else growing up when I'm just crying, eating, and having pregnancy scares?
I was expecting it to be of the "I am your vagina's reckoning" caliber.
Just because I don't want to be her booty call doesn't mean I wanna stop getting tit pics. I'm a sucker for double D's
That's like doing a cinnamon challenge in my vag - but more painful.
I thought I would be a proper lady and put my spare panties in a ziplock
And now to play every stoner's favorite game: Where the Fuck Did We Park the Car?! Disneyland Edition!
How hard do you think it would be to make a drinking game out of a Slip-N-Slide? Asking for a friend.
Awake! can you bring me my pants...im under the couch
We're at an agreement where I don't pry and she pretends blissful ignorance
Today I made my parents proud-spent the afternoon floating around in their pool drinking beer-which I would ask my nephews to get for me out of the fridge
Randomize
