You did not just play the dead husband card again.
RJ thinks I should put one of the muffins in my vagina. Good idea or bad idea?
She threw up in the hot tub how's your night
You fell on your face and the waitress just brought you a fresh drink
Apparently blowing a .28 for a cop and then kissing her on the mouth is technically assaulting a police officer. Who knew.
These bathrooms are miraculous. I'd love to have sex in here. Wow. I've peed 5 times.
IM A SHIT SUOW THE GUYS AT THE PMACR TOLD ME AJDBO I WEBF RO WALNARY WITH OU SHOES! I WASHT LLOWES FLOWERSA
Tell me again your tentative move date. There are 5 Russians in my apartment on ecstasy and they are having a rave in my living room. I can't. I need to move stat
I just found out two girls I dated met each other, bonded over how much they hate me, started dating and are gonna get married soon.
In my opinion the party was fun, but i did A LOT of cocaine so my view was a little distorted......
Well shit, I would've slept with him if I knew he was gonna be in the draft.
I think the pizza delivery guy is getting a handjob next door.
Sorry again for almost setting you on fire.
WHAT THE FUCK DREAM ME
I'M GONNA PUNCH THAT BITCH THE FUCK DID SHE THINK SHE WAS DOIN
What's a sexy way to say balls deep???
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