i really like this girl i slept with last night
you ask her out again?
yeah but she said she is busy next weekend getting married
as we were driving back from the frat house he pulled down his pants and convinced me his penis "wanted some air"
Watching water boil has never been so amazing. I love wake-and-bakes.
I knew I fucked up when I woke up with the meat scissors in my hand.
He sent me a picture of his ass and said the backdoor is open. Almost grabbed my keys and a condom before I saw it was a group text. Not nearly drunk enough for his desperation.
i know i said i'd always be there for you, but i'm beginning to think that what you call "being there for me" the american judicial system calls reckless endangerment.
I think my sunburn makes my ass look bigger
Can we talk about the fact that a stranger is doing a line of coke off our living room table right now?
He has started theming his dick pics. I have one he sent his duck has a sombrero on. Another a Barbie is riding it.
I can see your house from here
Get off of his fucking roof
Sex and bbq. He sure knows how to make a girl feel special
I woke up at 3am, top off, with campus security telling me to get dressed. Tonight was a GOOD NIGHT
You're going to love the baby's room.
I doubt it. I can't have sex there anymore. That severely limits the appeal of the room to me.
I may have just got motorboated by a male stripper who told me I should be a porn star and not a vet student.
My drug dealer just told me goodnight...I still don't know his name. But I guess you can say we've moved to the next step.
Randomize
