I just ate 10 fun sized 3 musakteers.. I'm pretty sure I'm about to start my period.
Talk to you next week
Please explain to me why I only attract Mormon guys. Just explain that to me.
I think it's God trying to counter your lustful nature. Imagine if Agnostics liked you. You'd never come out of your bedroom.
GO HOME AND LIKE EVERYTHING ON COLT'S FACEBOOK UNTIL 2007.
Wtf it's a Friday night?
PRIORITIZE.
The nice sales man at 711 gave me a handful of free lighters for buying a carton of cigarettes. I guess the depressed damsel in distress look works for me.
def just vomited mimosa in the gym trashcan. i weigh less already so i say its been a solid workout.
I had a pretty decent weekend -- aside from dropping the baby on her head. That.. That I feel bad about.
Iranian Rapper, camaroonian basketball player, mexican i forget and indian doctor....this one looks the best on paper.
Make puking fun. Chug half a monster right before you blow. Throw up foam. Most unique experience ever.
I just passed a drug test. I want to shout that from the top of a mountain. Can we have beers on the top of a mountain?
It's like you know you got fucjed up when you wake up and check fir your own pulse
I was walking out the front door and heard his roomate say "It looks like you need a chiropractor." I think my work here is done.
holy shit I just remembered that story I told about Tom hanks going bowling while high.
I need to be her Aladdin, and show her the world. The sex world.
Just stay awake and booze cruise it to class. How are you a senior and have never went to class drunk? No excuses, I have a better gpa.
the bucket list is making me question my morals...and sexuality
Randomize
