If i could bang her from 80ft away, I would
my entire walk over here no one looked in my eyes. Period Boobs are BAACKKK.
Just got my econometrics book in the mail and started flipping through it. Our Thursday parties may turn into u convincing me not to kill myself.
I dont know if this is a good time to tell you but im actually a freshman.. not a senior
Like it was the Mama Mia of shit shows. That bad.
My arms are still sore. Apparently, lube wrestling is the best workout ever.
At this point i guess a traditional, non-life-threatening pity fuck is too much to ask for
I knew you were super hungover. But so hungover you fire our house cleaner because her vacuums too loud is excessive
Ice cream and condoms, solid grocery store trip
I want to fling myself into the sun
I rocked his world in the back of my car in an overly-lit, heavily trafficked parking lot. Middle age is amazing!
I someohow managed to lose my butt plug in tne midst of moving to B.C. and I am not a happy camper.
Did you wake up next to Karina?
So that's her name
so i'm with my friends driving on the highway and just saw a guy in the car next to us sucking on a dildo. can't make this shit up.
Omg, new summer goal: sex in a bouncy castle.
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