If it was for sex do you really think i would asking for a mass vote? I'm like fidel castro when it comes to sex. No public approval needed.
Chicago was legit, ate some badass pizza and gave a cig to a crackhead..its all i thought it would be
i have a surprise for you that looks bigger since I found my body hair trimmer
don't be alarmed if you come back and i'm passed out drunk and naked cuddling with the franzia.
Sorry but i am wayy to hungover to take mom to her AA meeting.
Wont she be proud, Hailey.
Just drove past the dude that came in your sock
I'm having flashbacks from last night. Did I admit to pausing Whitney's funeral because I was watching porn? I believe I did.
after further investigation i found out he's a little bit married..
My high school reunion is Thursday so I need to find an outfit that says "Haha, you got fat and I got tits. Suck it, bitches."
She told me she's into girls now. I told her there would be a full bottle of j�ger and an empty bed here Friday.
She just won 2 Grammys at 17 and were sitting here hotboxing our half bathroom
So my flight takes off at 8am. Does this mean I need to break my airport bar pre-flight ritual?
Aren't you the one who taught me that airports are the judgement-free drinking zone?
Seriously, you just banged the guy that wishes his dog happy birthday on fb. That's fucking adorable!
I feel like I should have held a press conference. The state of my vagina
I didn’t want a minivan, but I have to admit it’s made it a lot easier to hook up with the dilfs at soccer tournaments
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