hi brent please bring bad word music cd must most bad word please brent bring cd music bad word please brent bring cd music bad word
its not like she's the last girl on the planet with symmetrical breasts and great skin
I feel like a fucking princess. Like an heiress of a kingdom of drugs.
Clusterfucked is a frowned upon word in work related emails
Found him fucking some random drunk chick in the bathrrom at the blue lep with a beer in each hand. had to give him props.
I just realized I'm trading you a pregnancy test for the morning after pill...
It's been a bad semester.
How am I supposed to stop smoking pot when girl scout cookies are being sold.
I just woke up from quarter beer tuesdays wearing 3 pairs of underwear, none of which are the ones I left wearing...2 Around my waist and one around my shoulder in an attempt at a bra. At least drunk me tries to be decent?
Your "dubstep at ceilis" resulted in a random naked guy busting into my room and peeing all over my bathroom
Your birthday is now over. Your day in the spotlight has dimmed and now you're as special as everyone else. The world goes back to revolving around me. Good night.
I tried to have sex on someone's sisters horse last night
I said no to friends with benefits because it was too much commitment
OH GOOD GOD THE BUFFALO WING SAUCE IS BURNING MY FUCKING CUNT. WHY THE FUCK DID I AGREE TO SPICY AND NOT MILD
She came out of the bathroom listening to her iPod and crying. Then she started scream 'she will be loved'. She seems to be handling the break up well lol
Can’t. It’s taco and dick night.
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