Myspace is for pedophiles and tweakers in the 818 trying to hook up. I always forget theres music there too
You said you couldnt get the condom on but "its the thought that counts"
This guy kept running around with a blender giving people shots of everclear and vodka. Best. Toga. Party. Ever.
If you don't come out tonight, who's going to wake us up in the morning because they're fucking in the middle of the room where everyones sleeping?
Currently emptying half-full wine bottles from fridge into my mouth and refilling with water for later. Drunk survivalist recycling!
Shoot me. I need tickles, a drink, sushi and a handy
Order is debatable
Well I don't know him that well so I don't think I can give advice. You should make him a cake. Or have sex with him.
Do pleather leggings scream im easy on a first date?
I woke up in a toga after going to a Hawaiian party. I don't even know.
I seriously had alll four of your knuckles bruised into my arm
no strings attached, like you could fuck him and then throw him off a building right after
All boys are excommunicated from my vagina until further notice.
Is it rude to say "I hate you because you live inside Hillary Clinton's asshole"?
Relax
It's hard to relax when a woman is waxing your asshole.
There are twenty eight units in that building. There has to be at least one heterosexual in it. You can't have fucked your way through all of it.
Randomize
