Pretty sure somebody just said 'I used to have a nipple'
that's awkward
Guys are so much hotter at OU. Come my mating season, I am flying south like the geese in the wintertime.
he just told me about his fetish for rubbing grape jelly on his penis.
i was so drunk that i ate a carrot out of her guiena pig's cage and thought it was normal
I coulnt tell if he was cumming or if I was throwing up
we hate each other therefore the sex is mindblowing
the trick is not to think about where her tounge has been.
You dont understand he had a split tongue thats bucket list worthy.
I'm trying to convey to the smoking hot Spanish cleaning lady at work that I want to bone her but I think it's getting lost in translation. How do you say "blowjob" in Spanish?
I'm not a home wrecker but if one more married man with a yacht asks me to go scuba diving I'm NOT saying no
If you haven't seen a huge black man in tiny red snowflake shorts that barely cover his dick, then you don't know what I'm going through.
As much as I enjoyed playing drunk half naked twister and talking about my daddy issues last time, I'll have to pass.
I miss forts and drugs that made me believe in unicorns...
If you could get me there thatd be perfect. I doubt there's extradition on the moon.
We blew shit up to. With a cannon.
Randomize
