But you know it's love when you find brass knuckles in the same box he keeps his Naruto action figures.
god damn woman. you are like the herpes of drunk texting. you never go away.
Do you think this abandoned cigarette has herpes? cuz I'm tempted.
Went to mcdonalds... Wishing I could throw up the last 20 hours of my life.
Are you pissed because you didn't get action, or the fact i got boned twice in public places tonight?
Part of my whole not being a slut anymore involves not giving other peoples boyfriends blowjobs
I ended up in a shower with 9 people and a bunch of unopened beer last night. I think I got peed on. Hands were everywhere. We sold the peed on beer to people knocking on the hotel room door.
Wow, now I'm sad I didn't go.
His blow is so strong I threw up. Buy it. I'm in nursing school I know what I'm talking about.
ughh I puked about 4 times on metro, no one seems to like the cool design I made on my shirt
im just laying in bed, eating, getting fat, enjoying eating and getting fat, thinking about how i will probably have to get a fat boyfriend.
Back. Waiting on Thong the shuttle bus driver. THONG
There is a severe lack of banging on that itinerary... I'd like a revision on my desk within the hour
I was just wicked nice to a telemarketer... that's how stoned this woman got me.
I should be free tonight unless my 5 speed vibrator arrives in the mail today, than we might have scheduling conflicts.
Think of the things uve done in the past. And ask urself "have I done worse?" If u answer yes. Its perfectly ok.
Randomize
