like why cant he just admit that he still wants to fuck me even though im underage
you made me "pop lock and drop it" as a sobriety test last night..
i just farted in the library and heard some girl yell it was sulfur gas. can. not. move.
to cover up your slurred speech you tried talking like the creepy old man from family guy
Well I woke up with a note on me reading Dear Passed Out Girl, and ending with why I shouldn't drink so much. Damn Tequilla.
my dad just told me he wants a furry wall in the house... i'm proud and concerned
I don't even want to think what you did to boys being that drunk and horny.
Then I wouldn't suggest looking at the pictures from last night.
Cumming on a girls face is guy code for you're not wife material.
So howd u manage to get high at a one year olds birthday anyway?
I haven't gone out since the baby was born. If I don't get arrested, in a fight, or both I'm going to be super pissed.
I feel like you guys are talking about real things and have real problems and I'm just over here like 'should I take muscle relaxers or get drunk tonight?'
I was thinking that maybe I should not apply to Wells Fargo because they def have me on candid camera taking a drunken nap at 3am in their lobby.
Would it be totally wrong, that in honor of princess leias death, I role played as her??
I just tried to snap you a picture of the CVS where we decided not to become parents.
She called a 10 year old handsome and we gave her a look that was equal parts confused and “what the hell is wrong with you”
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