Just checked, might have creepy crawlies. What does chlamydia feel like? Not near wireless to consult webMD.
New moon trailer came on. Theater booed. I love these people.
Apparently throwing up on your own cape is still a party foul
being a part time student has turned me into a full time alcoholic.
I'm looking at pot farms on google earth. Google should be proud I found a real purpose for it to serve.
I'm making celebratory pizza rolls. They're a lot like regular pizza rolls, but without the taste of shame.
What can I say, your life is charmed. I'm on the couch trying to decide whether or not to puke again.
I just wanted to clarify that I am not bisexual and had no intentions of ACTUALLY penetrating my roommate with a can of bugspray.
He walked away from the girl that just blew him to hook up with another girl, and when she got pissed he just turned around and screamed, "SHE IS LIKE 10X HOTTER THAN YOU!" Then she went on an angry dick sucking rampage. There were 4 victims.
I went down on her on the dining room table. That should count for something.
After the apocalypse all we'll have is vodka and twinkles.
I can't handle more than one dick at once. I become crazy. It's hard to be mellow and free spirited and polygamous at the same time.
My boobs are hoarders, they steal food and hide it. Greedy bitches.
I also tried to hide a bottle of vodka in a build a bear last night so that something that happened in my life
Got a $290 noise violation last night for shouting "THE KING OF THE NORTH" til 2 am
Randomize
