Did you hallucinate the same white buffalo that I did last night.
No, but I did see you shaking hands with a homeless man.
That should be a holiday. like easter. but bulges instead of baskets
just went to the store to buy a mop & tampons. i feel like i just gave in to all those women jokes.
He hid IN a snowbank for 2 hours waiting for me to come home. This game has to stop before someone dies.
Let's discuss options later this evening. I'll draw out said options and compare and contrast the "accessibility" of the costume for quickies. Because you never know. Halloween is full of surprises. I'll also compare practicality, level of skank, and creative features.
I remember key bumps, porn and a mom in my bed. Sums up my day.
that is an amazing summary hahaha
THINK! exactly how many raw eggs did you color and hide in my apt.
The cat be actin like a 2:30 am poop is the time to tell me all about her thoughts and fears in life. No bitch, this is definitely alone time.
Happy anniversary, did you sign and mail in the divorce papers yet?
You came out in nothing but lingerie and a Jedi robe claiming you needed more of those baby hot dog things or you were gonna go all Sith on us
Which sister was it? The one I accidentally hit when my shoe flew off or the one I ate candy off of when we were high?
good news, i've got tacos. bad news, kevin's in the ER. more good news, the tacos were free.
There are way too many people I have fucked in this class for this not to be awkward
She really wants to put my dick in her mouth, and to be honest I really don't want to put it there.
Next time we do shrooms i am finding an open field at sunrise and running through it and nobody is stopping me this time!
Randomize
