yo I wanna see you, bring that beard of yours
she was using a pencil to fish crushed adderall out of a plastic bag. it was like a college version of fun dip
I submitted an essay to my history teacher comparing changes in the middle ages to the song changes by David Bowie. I can't wait to see my grade on that.
You tried to pay the bartender in graduation checks, I think you'll be fine in the real world.
omfg. get on facebook. the science olympiad team had a rave.
As far as figuring life out your talking to a guy that's alternating text messages between his baby mama and a drunk bitch I met tailgating. My best advice is don't worry about shit out of your control and always and I really mean ALWAYS wear a condom.
THE BIG GAY MAD HATTER IS HERE AND HE HAS DRUGS IN HIS PANTS FOR YOU. COME DOWNSTAIRS BITCHEZZZZ
I'm assuming the reason my elbow is so sore has something to do with all the broken shot glasses eh?
Yep
God I need to stop before there's a picture of my dick on my mom's phone.
Its like I've been given a sexual blank check.
You're going to find someone that you love very much and that loves you, and then you're gonna find an additional person that you literally can't stop staring at from across the room. I feel very confidently about that
If this gives you any indication of my current state, I stopped at Meijer after work and bought funyuns, pregnancy tests and chocolate.
You ran outside of the party to do the rain dance and swim in puddles
My boobs look fucktastic, I have a booty call on Sunday and a dick photo on my phone. Life is grand!
Tonight I totally got eaten out in the old school photo booth in the mall. Will send you pics of the photo reel asap
Randomize
