i told my doctor i had 3 partners and one unprotected.. shes a cute little indian lady i couldnt break her heart
His second form of ID was an emergency room wristband from an hour ago. What the fuck is going on right now
Haha yeah he had an allergic reaction to the alcohol earlier. He thinks that if he only drinks vodka he will be ok...
Girl passed out in class and vomited. Another victim of syllabus week
I'm missing some hair, but it's cool. Breadsticks are done.
I haven't gotten it in awhile but since spring break is next week I'm willing to have a pregnancy scare if it means no bleeding through the suit
Yeah wouldn't want it to interfere with beach sex. Nothing should interfere with beach sex
In her drunkenness, she packed a bag with tequila, two shot glasses, salt, a knife, and two pears. She was prepared but too high to distinguish pears from limes.
You would think the bank would reward me for getting my account down to 3 cents without overdrafting it.
I just want a man to crawl into my bed with me and never crawl out. Anti socialism at his best.
Honestly it's a super power. I can try it a million different ways and nothing happens. Donnie casually says "ok this is now a toppless party" and it all kicks-off
What's the place called?
I searched "county" on google, but....there's a lot of results
The only alcohol at my aunts was mikes hard so I drank 9 of them and puked in the master bath
I tried to get more sleep but the universe decided I needed a drunken freshman instead
We were getting breakfast he shit himself in the middle of ihop. Mid bite he just yells out o fuck.
My boss is explaining why he thinks time goes by faster and faster. Bc of the rockets. No lie.
still drunk on my way to class to give my presentation on the negative affects of alcohol on the body. hell yes.
Randomize
