I just got a standing ovation when i made it to work on New Years Day. good thing?
If I had a motorized wheelchair, I'd just chase the squirrels on campus all day.
He came in my nose, then said it would help clear my sinuses.
definitely not taking the whole return culture shock so well...drinking a 100 proof rootbeer vodka float out of a german beer mass
after I lost so many games of beer pong they made me be a troll, I sat under the table and told riddles while retrieving balls.
This is what we get for YOLOing our way to obesity
From time to time I think I'm happy for a second and then I remember how a guy stopped me from giving him head on my birthday weekend.
Also, I want you to know, that not only am I apparently the expert on sexting. Our bishop is consulting me later. So my talents are varied.
My life is a video game called get the drunk princess back to her castle, thank you to all that participated
$1 drinks and Playboy theme. I am never leaving this place
On the way home there was a guy passed out IN the road on Colfax with his pants around his ankles, completely bare assed. If he was dressed as a speed bump, he succeeded.
She dresses like Bruce Banner and fucks like the Hulk. She is all of my lesbian fantasies come true.
See if shell let you call her dr banner in bed
I can't ever look his wife in the eye again. She will see right through my soul to his dick pic.
I hope April is a better month for dicks. March has been very disappointing.
There are two guys here arguing over Pearl jam and Nirvana. 1991 wants its argument back.
Randomize
