dude, she has braces
i meant the dude w the ponytail.
i was less creeped out when i thought you were talking about the 14 y.o.
good. and stop kissing my girl you dirty slut.
i don't think she's still your girl..plus, she kept screaming "kiss me! i'm a lesbian!" last night so i think you're outta luck..
she called my cock the "semen sword" and then we invented a position called excalibur
Same, I didn't even get to be tarzan this summer
In anticipation of No Judgement Tuesday, I believe a Can We LOL At What We Did Last Night Saturday is in order
If this party got busted it would be an improvement
OH MY GOD I JUST WANT TO GO HOME AND FART ALL NIGHT.
they adjusted my tv to black and white ... i thought i drank myself to colorblindness
If you need us, Zoe and I will be on my kitchen floor drinking Gatorade and crying
I blacked out at work again... Except this time my boss watched me throw up by the bus stop and some woman let me sleep on her shoulder for an hour. Why does this keep happening?
I'm jealous that you can use my boobs as pillows & I can't.
He went to cum on my stomach and somehow it got behind my ear. He's like a fucking jizz Houdini.
You slapped my ass and yelled "HOOTY TOOTY WHAT A BOOTY" in a Schwarzenegger voice
You can't do wine Netflix and blow jobs in the bed you've had since 5th grade with your parents downstairs
So you're not gonna be in town tonight?! Your dick was the light at the end of my academic tunnel!
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