I think I saw a glimmer of recognition, but she must not have been able to make me out through all of her whorishness.
nothing as in nothinggggg kills the mood for me is when a girl with 4 cm nipple hair
Go on vacation with her and forget to pack pants. I did that once and it worked like a charm.
Someone wrote Kyle's bitch on me too. I dont even know who Kyle is.
so I'm coping with getting the "I'm not over my ex" bomb dropped on me by getting drunk and yelling at people while wearing a purple princess hat
I recommend you throw your keys as far as you can in one direction, your phone as far as you can in the opposite direction, and hold on.
I think we should get high on adderall and nair each other again for New years.
The novelty of Nekkid Straight Roommate has faded.
And know that if I ever text "road head?" that it comes from a place of caring and not a place of heartlessness..
he's a ginger AND was born with 2 holes in his penis. sleeping with a rare species & I LOVE THE THRILL
He called me saying he got nice rims for his car so now we can fuck in style
I went to the strip club tonight. I had never gone, and in a panic I gave the dancer giving me a lap dance a handshake and introduced myself. Redefines business casual.
how do i act around someone who's shoes i puked in while naked and blackout?
I got my gum stuck on his balls.
had more orgasms than hours of sleep last night
Randomize
