Text. Mid BJ. 8 points.
it wasn't lemon gatorade
I just made out with a girl with a life jacket on wtf is going on
He gave me the "I've pictured you while jerkin off" look
I feel like my teeth are sweating.
My halloween constume SCREAMS "Hey i just got done with a shitty relationship and I'm DTF"
fat chick, vomit on the dog, and three unidentifiable pills in my ear. all in the same ear. what the hell happened after the guests showed up?
Can you bring me a corn dog or something shaped like one?
Because I know nothing is hotter than ocean themed dick pics on SnapChat...
my ex's current girlfriend held my hair as I threw up. new low.
I thought my sex drive was gone but let me tell you it is back with a vengeance
I'm jealous, curious, and aroused. All at the same time.
My job here is done.
So I almost broadcasted the porn from my phone to the boardroom chrome cast
3 words: harry potter burlesque. My life is so much more awesome than yours right now.
I don't care. We're going to fuck. And I WONT apologize in the morning. You cheated on me, so you can cheat on her with me.
Randomize
