Your sister got a Brazilian yesterday. It looks great
i mean, we fucked on the futon in the garage where his band practices. pretty sure im now obligated to like his band on facebook.
Bring a bathing suit for the glitter slip n slide
I couldn't find my shirt this morning so I stole one from his eight year old sister. Slutted up my outfit quite a bit.
Is there a special protocol when the stripper has a Boba Fett tattoo?
You both ran and jumped into the tub yelling Jamaican bobsled team
I picked a bad day to wear the catch me fuck me shoes.
Did someone catch you and fuck you?
So note to self oboe reeds soaked in Apple Rubinoff sound GREAT.
Aw don't be embarrassed. It was all good fun! We've all been there. You can't come to vegas and NOT get a little alcohol poisoning. That's like going to church and not praying.
How do you tell a woman that you are seeing that the scars on your back are from her awesome-in-bed little sister?
Stripping out of my teacher clothes to Talk Dirty to Me. Who let me become a teacher?
Dude, you GARGLED with bleu cheese last night!
Not only did I sleep with the guy but I think I may have called my work and quit to go work for him.
My last Google search was 'can an impotent man have sex'. I don't even want to know what I did with that guy.
Didn't know my clit could produce that many orgasms in one night. Fuck my husband; think I might have to become a lesbian.
Randomize
