I was watching truelife I'm transgendered. This tranny already got a date a week after getting a vagina. I've had a vagina my entire life and can't get a date.
She tried to keep her legs crossed last night while doing a keg stand. Way to keep it classy.
People are suprisingly accepting of someone doing a walk of shame in a toga...
I'm seriously gonna die surrounded by a million cats and an unbroken hymen
I'm sorry but I have to break up with you. My wife is pregnant and can't have a girlfriend too.
The last time you said "no one will know" is when you ran out of sprite at your birthday party and dumped a handle of straight up vodka into the jungle juice.
I bruised my vagina when I was climbing out of the trash can.
Oh my god i hate key west. No one takes amex and strippers took all my money
I don't remember where I was but I remembered that I hated everyone there
He just pulled a Spanish chick using google translate!!!! We are at the bar and she speaks zero English. Hes a fucking magician!!!!!!
He just compared our sex to a grand slam on Wii fitness
You're doing it right
You were cussing me out in sign language, and slurring your signs.
That's some kind of record drunk there...
When we became besties with benefits we agreed I could still get dick
I didn't think I'd have to specify "not my Dad"
I yelled at your uterus for you.
My New Year's resolution consists of less weekday hangovers, more sex, and more money.
Randomize
