Great, now everyone thinks I've had giraffe semen in me
it took me about 5 minutes before I knew it was in her ass. i thought the first time would be a bit more special
Unlimited sex for unlimited netflix. I can deal with that. I think this is the first prostitution deal for netflix ever.
I remember just enough about last night to wish I didn't remember anything.
they had to take the Corona's out of the fish tank because they wouldn't fit with the mini replica of the roman coliseum in there. so we drank the Corona's. does beer have an expiry date?
I'm so hungover it hurts to blink.. oh sweet merciful Christ what have I done
I think that's the first time Navy dress blues and a Ninja Turtles onesie have been involved in the same makeout.
It looks like I colored my belly button red at some point
I really have a thing for Greek chicks; I feel like while we are having sex she has the ability to make hummus which is just too appealing for me to pass up.
I've been to his house multiple times since that night and I STILL can't find my bra. And he says the hot tub ate my thong.
I'm so glad you support me having casual sex with your uncle
I think all three of us just need to suck it up and go to lunch with him to keep our bar tab down
he called me 'mate' and i had to remind him that you dont call people mate who continously make your dick hard
I'm surprised this is your first encounter with pepper spray. surprised, and somewhat proud.
I'm noticing I drink less and do fewer lines when I do both together.
Now that's what I call smart money management.
Randomize
