Do you not remember dry humping your dog for 20 minutes at oxfest dude?
Midget Michael Jackson impersonator dancing to Beat it in Penn Station almost caused me to miss my train. God, I
i would only ever fuck harry potter if he was on a broomstick.
woke up to an overdrawn credit card. did you order the dawsons creek boxset last night?
i hope so.
I'm gonna need a helmet and adult supervision by 9...
I'm okay with corrupting his young mind.
Ew! He's just a child!
AND I'M GONNA SHOW HIM HOW TO MAKE ONE.
Fuck edible panties there is a dress made out of bacon
First sunburned tits of the season. And it's only April... I feel like it's going to be a good summer.
dude there's a blind guy on the trail using his service dog to hit on girls.
Thanks for that golden cinnamony goodness that flowed from your fake tits last night haha
The sex is great, I just think it'd be better if we listened to Deftones during it.
Apparently I was having great conversation with this 48 year old on grindr & he was concerned as to how I was getting home.
I'm pretty sure I just won at life. I touched the bushy tail of a squirrel while he had his mouth full and was digging in a plant on campus. That is all.
Getting on a bus with a beer pong table. I am proof we can make this campus fun.
I need to hurry up and get over my feelings for him so next year's tipsy reunion sex won't be clouded by emotions.
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