it felt great physically, but AWFUL morally.
i guess i finally out drove tiger woods this morning..
hapi new year, hope this year brings u happiness and lots of sexi people ;)
stop writing like that.
her idea of "friends with benefits" is her doing my laundry. i'm cool with it.
You really realize what your life's become when you're sitting alone in the house crying in a santa hat and pjs getting stoned on christmas eve before noon.
I experienced pure joy just moments ago when I looked down and saw that I had another pop tart to consume down my mouth hole.
I haven't been motivated enough for a shirt. And only half the day was bra-worthy.
I'm tellin ya, let the nipple get some air, they'll hire u on the spot, lawyers love a little nip
She asked me to come on her OkCupid date with her
Random one night stand with a guy that had a USA tattoo on his ass. Can't possibly get more American than that
Chasing my kid around a 30' jungle gym was not how I envisioned spending the day off work to recover from a vasectomy.
He has a baby picture of himself on the night stand. I don't think this whole 'one night stand' thing is for me.
Shia just rubbed his beard the way I do all the time and maybe he's my soul sister. This live stream is life changing.
How was I supposed to know the accent was fake before i slept with him
OMG also, I'm sorry I tased you a lil
Randomize
