I just need someone to hold me and tell me i dont turn boys gay
I only had sex with her cause she looked like jwoww from jersey shore
I heard from multiple reliable sources that she doesn't have a gag reflex. Of course I'm going to try to go home with her.
I wish i could be on x for the rest of my life.
How many times can I tell him I wasnt expecting sex before he realizes I'm just too lazy to shave all the time?
I don't think anybody else enjoys making out with multiple guys on the same night as much as I do. I'm like a wine taster but with lips... it's like art to me. The bruise on my upper lip is proof of it
Hey, you gotta think, is this REALLY the penis you wanna see for the rest of your life? THINK!
I was puking in the bathroom when my fake tooth fell off of my retainer so I just walked out of the bar and didn't say goodbye to my date
I think the saddest part about my sex life is that most of it is pity sex.
My greatest achievement in life thus far is being the go to friend when you have questions about butt plugs.
I'll like his pictures on Instagram every once and a while so that when he sees my name he is reminded of the best blow job he's ever gotten.
Yes. Life would be much easier if we had penises & could do whatever the fuck we want.
If my emotions are below a 3 or above a 7, I'm crying
it doesn't matter what you do now, you will forever be known as the girl who fell off the roof
nooooo! we need to brain storm. I need rebranding....what if I start always showing up with my cat or a wacky hat?
try again roofio
What did you spend the night in her closet?
She said she was saving me for breakfast and locked me in there
Randomize
