somehow in between the body shots the bong hits and trying to convince the 7-11 lady to let me fill up my vodka bottle with cherry slurpee. i misplaced my car.
My clean wipe streak was ended today by two enchiladas and a can of refried beans. dammit i should have been more cautious. thanks for all ur encouragement and support.
his text ended with ... everyone knows dot dot dot equals infer sexy time
If I'm going to go gay, i'm not going to go for a tiny dick.
um, yes. it's my birthday, of course there will be acid.
he put $150 on the cabs dash so 9 of us could pile in and ride 3 blocks to the apartment.
Pissing in la rieve gfox. Jer zsyuis diu drunk but it felt amazunbg
Dans le librearie ivetre. Hjhaha
I took my shirt off and stood in the kitchen for an hour and a half talking to his parents about my tattoos
Will you please bring your dog over today? Apparently I was drunkenly cooking last night. There's food everywhere. I'm too hungover to clean.
I'm hungover and surrounded by children and Republicans. What did I do to deserve this?
we drunk the bar out of liquor so the guy was selling us bottles of wine for $2a each. Only good thing to come outta this flood
I'm not dropping acid and watching game of thrones with you. That just sounds like a disaster waiting to happen.
Well I just woke up to no pants, Gatorade on the headboard along with an uneaten steak, and the instinct I was a giant asshole.
You made me promise I wouldnt let you play "fuck fuck goose" with a 40 year old ever again.
Moms passed out wet and naked in a rocking chair again....
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