Midgets have it so easy. They have so much less leg area to shave.
whoever created level 16 on brickbreaker is a dick
Looking at the victoria's secret website makes the ice cream I'm eating taste like sadness and obesity
Apparently he always goes for the wrong girl so it should be easy for me to nail him.
Not sure. No solid plans. Just tanning nude.
take 2 Ambien then drink a Red Bull and watch Alice in Wonderland. Trust me.
I just had a vision of confetti exploding out of someone's vagina to the sound of air horns... I think that would be welcoming.
I like the way you think.
Listen I'm a sentimental character under all this alcohol and ratchetry
I'm at a gyno in Japan. Safe to say every possible rule of etiquette is about to be broken. Buckle up, motherfuckers.
How many times is too many times to use the word 'fuck' in my thesis?
He couldn't undo my bra. He ended up breaking the clasp he clawed at it so long. We met on Tinder for God sake
What type of bandaid should I use on my clit
I accepted my type is not "conventionally attractive" when she asked me "Him? Are you sure?" 5 times in front of him last night
FUCKIN BIRDS ARE CHIRPING AT 4 IN THE MORNING. THE SUN ISN'T RISING YET MOTHERFUCKERS, GO BACK TO YOUR NESTS.
I cant believe you bit her ass cheek, she must have been really weirded out.
yeah so we made out to make it less awkward
Randomize
