i just walked passed a table of guys by myself.. they looked @ me talked and then yelled 7
id pin you as more of an 8
im too high. i could barely wash my hair, let alone handle a whole shower
Thank God. You really dodged a small penis there.
stumble upon led me to how to make wine in prison, followed by wedding dresses. it knows my life too well
do you realize that she was the awkward lesbian in high school and now bangs more girls than probably both of us combined?!
he was gone before i woke up. left a pee stain, phone number, note and $20 for sheets. safe to say i will not be calling.
But theres a keg here and me gusta
Did I really drink that whole bottle of Jack Daniels last night?
Heroically.
Oh yeah I remember when I first saw Kyler's balls. If there's anything high school swim prepared me for, it's the amount of testicles I would see here
well i mean, we just followed them into an alien and astronaut party. there was tin foil everywhere
He will forever be known as the toe sucker who may or may not have been a father
I didn't even mind that he came early I just wanted to get eaten out and cuddle
I wrote him a note at the end of the final. I'm hoping I can flirt my way in to an A or B
He is a real estate investor who’s face I’m going to sit on.
you said, "I wonder what your mum is doing right now." in the middle of sex, of course I threw up on you.
Randomize
