i saw a guy balancing a black cat on his head last nite
get a pic
i tried he was too far away anotherguy was walking with paper bags on his feet explain that
i want ur life
the girl next to me in class is drawing a guy banging a chick doggy style...its very detailed
Dude, I just went to take a piss and looked at my ballsack... Underneath was labled "L" and "R"
You drew a self portrait of yourself on his wall with sharpie.
It's like Facebook knows when I'm about to masturbate and tells me to reconnect with exes.
Not to make her into that kind of girl, but she did have a condom mural
He sent me a pic of his Junk. He said it was a Brett Farve valentine.
Do you know how hard it is to write about pediatric crohn's when we're trying to figure out the keg situation for graduation?
I would makeout with my roommate, but im not drunk enough and she doesnt like bacon fat
I am coping with the snow storm with beer and shots of jack. If I were outside in shorts I might be able to pass as a Canadian.
Itd be nice if there was a level of interest in me somewhere in between the indifference and obsession that I've only been attracting
I think God is sending me all these 20 year olds to make up for wasting my 20's in that crappy ass marriage. Thanks Big Guy!
Rule number 1 of dorm living: do not forget your butt plug in the bathroom.
She threw her burger out the car window last night. My vegan neighbors were not pleased but I’m pretty sure I saw a for sale sign go up on their lawn so I owe her one.
I didn’t spend $100 for a wax to sit here and listen to you FT your brother to complain about how bad the Jets are.
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