at a bonfire and someone threw a plastic cup in the fire. everyone immediately stopped what they were doing to yell collectively at him about what he was doing to the environment, then went back to drinking
only in oregon
You kept shouting "Relax and take notes" every time before you would hit the blunt
airport. 106 proof japanese liquor. 4 little travel size containers. im proud to be smarter than the average american.
She recited Pi throughout ever orgasm she had....she said it was a game she likes to play...how far she gets is how she judges her lovers...I am oddly turned on by this...
If we both stop thinking about your penis for just a moment, we'd realize it is important and good that you are spending quality time with your family
I need to find more Xanax, my Grandpa doesent leave for another week and he's made it a mission to get me to come out of the closet as a xmas gift to my parents.
Last night after the bar I went home and ate a pulled pork sandwich in a bubble bath
We found him sitting in a beach chair in the basement storage room passed out. Idk if we should move him or pass the bowl around.
Fulfilled a bucket list goal last night. Borrowed a dollar from a stripper to buy smokes
God bless Atlanta.
How was it playing wingman?
I feel like I was rockys coach watching him get the shit beaten out of him by Apollo creed
I peed sitting down because I knew standing was a lost cause
So i had a feeling this dude with one leg in a wheelchair was following me around Walmart turns out I was right. He just asked for a picture of my feet.
i mean i let him but still...
If you don't wanna wax my ass just say so.
Stop it with the monkey emojis. It's like sexting with Curious George
Yep. Just fucked a 34 year old on the football field where we both went to high school. That's a story for the grandkids.
Randomize