My mother just asked me if i ever swallow the goods...should i be concerned?
I was dancing barefoot on glass at one point. That really sobered me up.
Just found out its our ciliated mucous membrane that traps the molly when we snort it. Biology does relate to life
I knew the cheap date at Taco Bell would backfire because it makes even the most pre-cautious girls involuntary fart in public
Met the five year old's gym teacher for next year. He is an old drinking buddy and I used to fuck his older brother. It was like a walk of shame 20 years late.
Man, the last time I saw you you were giving me a thumbs up while being pulled out the bar by your belt from some girl.
...Saturday night. Get your dick ready. We are going to go nuts. I want to have sex fucking everywhere.
I got carried to one bar. Got a piggy back ride to the next bar. I was just testing our drinking team for st pattys day to make sure they are able to handle me more drunk than that.
Indeed. Apparently I called my sisters and told them I wouldn't get arrested because it's not a real sword.
I feel like as your wife, as cool with your decision-making skills as I usually am, there should be a bigger explanation to you adopting a child while I'm in Houston.
Either I'm paranoid or I swear my parents rigged my house so you can never sneak in or have the munchies without being loud.
Omg no. We ate a raw pumpkin last nighr. We dipped it in BBQ sauce.
Still, being medically ordered to stuff things in your vagina is amazing.
And thanks for putting me in that safety position on the bathroom floor while I was spooning the toilet
In other news there's 12 shirtless Korean dudes all trying to jump on a tiny little trampoline so that's entertaining
Randomize
