READY
for what?
TO HAVE SEXXXX
i think you have the wrong number
Who do you think planted the wheat? Who do you think cleared the land and killed off the native inhabitants? Women?
why is every porn film shot in the same house? with the same red couch!?!
now I regret adding my aunt on facebook. she remnded me today on my wall about the importance of checking my stools for blood since I have diaherria.
I just wiped my vajayjay with snow. Bad idea.
i just heard someone have an orgasm and then throw up through the vent in my room.
my mom took me to a gay bar and went on and on about all her good times at clubs... i now know where i get it
Honestly, your dog is in better hands with that homeless guy.
He kept telling me that something was trying to enter this dimension from another universe through his spine...
the thing I didn't realize I would miss about college is that at home you can't just dismiss your sex bruises as drunk accidents
I am now being bribed with one orgasm per every meal I eat. This is the best anorexia therapy ever
Want to do me the honour of waxing my legs again before I go to Mexico? I feel like it's a tradition we shouldn't break.
It doesn't count as "finding the lesbian" if you fuck a straight girl!
I woke up cuddling a ham. That's not a euphemism. I actually slept with an entire ham.
just found a joint on the street in downtown. smoked it with the hot guy from my chem class
WHAT IS UP WITH YOU SMOKING/ DRINKING THINGS OFF THE GROUND?
Randomize
