Where are you?
In a non slutty way
Remember that dream I told you about where I shit out my own skeleton? I had it again last night.
people are starting to question the shark bite story
I have 11 glasses of water and one beer on the table infront of me. Have to keep going to different bartends to get more. There are only two though and I think they've caught on
Just saw you drinking out of a flask on national tv. I've never been more proud of you
I tell myself every day I shouldn't be friends with you
I woke up naked wrapped in my roommate's towel with one leg shaved and money thrown all over the room. Happy 21st birthday.
But college guys get to crossfade so there's that
No idea what that is
Like getting bent? When you drink and smoke together...
I'm 30 stop using your cool kids words
I woke up to him "wax on, wax off"-ing my boobs. I just reminded myself that I love him and let it happen.
I think I'm just going to go like every guy on tinder who has a jetski. I'm doing this for us, Summer is coming.
I didn't want to leave, I wanted to move into his ass
sending my old camp counselor nudes. childhood memory win or new low?
His mom wants to come see the dorm.
Hide the whip.
Good news!! I can adult!! 😂 turning down the strip club on a weeknight has become my crowning achievement ðŸ˜ðŸ˜‚
Access to a Target is paramount to my general happiness and self-worth.
Randomize
